Return to Sender

So to continue in the unknown cause and ongoing saga that is my current lady troubles I went for a Pap Test the other day.

After about 20 minutes of me laying there staring at the ceiling trying to ignore the discomfort and intrusion down the other end the doctors face reappears.

“Um I can’t find your cervix”

“Excuse me?”

“I can’t find your cervix”

The thought process commenced.

Surely it’s where I left it last.

Maybe it’s shy and hiding.

There’s no way that accidentally fell out right?

I was sure I had one this morning.

What I actually said was:

“Um ok”

“Yeah it’s the first time that has ever happened to me”

Oh great no wonder it’s hiding it knows she’s seeing other cervixes behind my back.

You are the doctor right?

I’m drawn to the only viable conclusion….obviously someone has borrowed it and not returned it.

So if you do currently happen to have it in your possession rest assured I won’t charge a late fee but I really would like it back.

Linking up with the hilarious Em who always makes me smile.



14 thoughts on “Return to Sender

  1. OMFG – that is ridiculous – and a wee bit funny! Next time – oh shit I hope there isn’t a next time – but you know what I mean, next time say what you think – it’s hilarious! Thanks for linking lovely xx

  2. Omg Rachel my twin sis has two shall I get her to send you one……she also had two wombs I always said she was a greedy bugger lol ……seriously tho hope they find it !!!, and you can get back to normal xxx

  3. Well I learned something new lol did not know you could lose them, have corners or have 2. Love ya xx deb

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