You Can Go Your Own Way

Maria Kang….the name seems to spark great debate amongst people. Some think she is heaven sent and some people think she is way out of line and you wanna know what I think? She is one woman with one opinion.

Personally I think she looks amazing- fit and healthy and good on her because she obviously values healthy eating and exercise. She doesn’t intimidate me or motivate me because if abs were my motivation I would have drawn them on by now.

I remember when it felt like my facebook went nuts with the poster of her with her kids and her non drawn on abs and that headline of “What’s you excuse?”. So many people were offended and not only that felt the need to defend their choices, their bodies and their lack of posterworthy abs.

This is one woman that I am fairly certain that nobody in my newsfeed knew personally and yet it felt like they all wanted her approval or her understanding. If you asked me what my excuse was I would tell you 1 of 2 things either “None of your damn business” or “Never judge a book by it’s cover”. Because like Eleanor Roosevelt said “Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent” and I have had enough of justifying how I look to the outside world who believe they are entitled to make assumptions about my appearance.

They don’t know about my battle or my current and ongoing wins they just see a big girl sitting in a restaurant and believe it will make my day better by telling me to eat a salad once in a while….it used to spoil my evening or make me cry now it honestly gives me a little chuckle because I know me, I value me and when it comes down to them or me you better believe it that MY opinion of ME is going to win.

The marathon continues and there are long ways to go yet, the very least of it is how I look on the outside. How do I feel on the inside? Worlds different. I can move, dance, run. I think about what it is I eat and consume. I know without a doubt that the better I eat the better I feel. I drink water. I have cut down on caffeine, I make healthy choices and I am loving myself sick for it.

This is about individual journeys, yours, mine and even Maria Kangs…no one journey is comparable to another we all have separate barriers and strengths and expectations. I don’t want abs of steel I just want to be healthy and to ride on amusement park rides without any restrictions. What’s my excuse? Nothing I’m too busy being awesome.

rachnose<Linking up with the awesome Jess from Essentially Jess because IBOT>

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27 thoughts on “You Can Go Your Own Way

  1. I didn’t really get why everyone found that so offensive. I don’t look like her, but I did think it was funny, and ‘good for you’. In the same way I don’t find it offensive all the pretty models advertising to me.
    But I am a HUGE fan of Eleanor Roosevelt – she wrote the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. She was a kick ass woman, to be greatly admired. But again, lets celebrate appearance because that’s all women have to offer….(that refrain doesn’t grow tired…)

  2. Hell to the yeah! You really do have the most awesome attitude. I don’t get why and how people can be so judgemental and jump to conclusions when they know no history or background. Small minds, I tell you. Good on you, the healthy eating is not easy. I’m on this journey with you xx

  3. *standing ovation*

    I blogged about this Maria Kang image the other week because it’s been such a polarising subject. I actually lost a friend over it. This former friend didn’t think that Kang was being very feminist. She said that the allegations she photoshopped stretch marks off her abdomen (three babies in three years) and posing in her tiny little gym gear meant that she was not feminist. My counter argument was that I believe women can love however the heck they want. That if she was a dad posing with his kids all muscly and strong, women everywhere would be salivating over him. I believed that she was in fact the victim if bullying and that feminism does not (and cannot) have strict rules to adhere to, because you know, then it wouldn’t be feminism. As choice is taken away from the woman. This sparked two weeks of online harassment until she finally stopped, blaming me for ignoring her and not being a very good friend (all because of a difference in opinion). She also dropped a good friend rather unceremoniously.

    I think the Eleanor Roosevelt quote is just perfect for this. Women need to stop letting others opinions change how they feel about themselves. Our society has women so conditioned to conform. “Be bikini ready for summer”, “how to make him wild in bed”, “ten tips for looking good naked” etc. Maria Kang is actually sprouting a healthy message, eat right and exercise, yet she gets caned, not the editors of glossy magazines who photoshop images of the Duchess of Cambridge to have a giant nose and wrinkles under the headline “What’s happened to Kate?”

    We need more trailblazing, strong, beautiful women like you Rach. It’s going to be a long fight and we may not win it in our lifetime, but at least we can continue the legacy started by our mothers in the 60s and 70s and leave more groundwork covered for our daughters/nieces x

  4. I am with you, her posts didn’t really bother me. I think she obviously spent a lot of time before, during and after pregnancy eating right and excercising. I am really happy with my fitness and a little definition right now but I don’t hate that little extra bit of skin I have on my belly post pregnancy. People need to stop being offending and find their own centre and fitness level. Great post!

  5. I would be tempted to punch someone in the face if they had the total disrespect for another to suggest eating a salad! What kind of person says that or thinks it is OK in any parallel dimension to do so?
    Bugger them, I as amazed at how wonderful you are doing. Feeling fantastic and loving yourself for your awesomeness!
    I think you should be praised and those other people pitied.

  6. “What’s my excuse? Nothing I’m too busy being awesome.” LOVE IT! She doesn’t offend me but I can see how she could be offensive. The thing is, you NEVER know another’s path unless you have walked in their shoes. What’s their excuse? It could be anything from illness to injury to just not giving a damn, what business is it of hers!? In saying that, I had every excuse under the sun before I got fit and healthy(er – still not the healthiest I could be but I believe in enjoying life also!). xo

  7. β€œWhat’s my excuse? Nothing I’m too busy being awesome.” No greater words spoken. You are awesome. And so is Maria Kang. We all are. I think that is part of the problem. We are so good at tearing each other down. Maybe once in a while we need to stop and just encourage each other – no judgement. Josefa from #teamIBOT

  8. I hate eating in public for that reason. I always feel like there is 100 eyes on me watching what I put in my mouth and judging me. The truth is that 99% of them don’t care and it’s my own hang ups that are making it difficult.
    I love your quote at the end! Power to you!

  9. I so look forward to your post Rach and this one is what I needed to read ….I have been having a few issues with myself this past week and Ali has been very patient with me ….it all started ( as it does every year) with me looking for a dress for the Hogmanay black tie ball.. now because of my back I always get that dreaded feeling of “oh god I’ve got to get a dress” which fills me with absolute dread anyway I ordered a couple of dresses and I really liked them they were nice but I couldn’t make up my mind so I said to Ali will you take photos of me and then I’ll decide …worst thing I could have done, the dresses have now been sent back and I’ve said I’m not going to the ball (I do this every year) I will go to the ball but I know I will look at my friends with shear envy ….I’m not saying they are slim they’re not but their bodies are in proportion where I’m not and that along with being overweight just depresses me . I’ve sent away for another dress but I’m not getting any photos done !!!!
    I feel better now that I’ve got that of my chest thank you. Xx

  10. Firstly, I never knew her name, so thanks for that πŸ™‚
    Secondly, why do we need an excuse? You know what, I have four kids and I exercise a lot but I still don’t have that stomach. Part of it is genes, and part of it is, like you said, I know myself and what I need. I don’t need to have an obvious six pack. I just need to feel strong and healthy and confident about me.
    I love that you exude confidence in who you are, and that you are trying to be healthier, and that’s what we should all aim for body wise. You’re an awesome role model xx

  11. I think had she used different words then the reaction could have been so different. It’s inspiring to see how well she has taken care of herself despite having three little ones. But the words she used, and the tone they convey, leads others to feel judged and so they judge in return. It’s a vicious cycle. If you remove those words from the picture and just included the words “three kids under three” she would have found a lot more fans than she has.

    You are of course right though, that how we choose to react says a lot more about us than it does about the person we are reacting to. I am critic enough of myself that I don’t need to be worrying about what other people are thinking of me and hearing their voices in my head. I’ve come to realise that the road to health and fitness is a long one, a marathon as you say, and just because I have a bad day, week, month, doesn’t mean I should stop trying. You are an inspiration Rach, Amy-Lee that we went to school with is an inspiration. It’s your attitudes that have inspired me and help me to pick myself up and keep on pushing after a fall.

    Love your work! xxx

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