Where Is The Love?

My eyes have recently opened to the amount of negativity that exists in our day to day lives. What happened to all the cheerleaders?

A friend of mine has been on a journey to health, nutrition and fitness for about 2 years now. This friend looks INCREDIBLE, she glows, she is living proof that when you put the right things in your body and exercise you really do look your best self. Her hair is healthy and her skin clear and fresh looking and yes she is slimmer than when she started but she is in noway in the “underweight” category. She looks healthy, fit and happy.

For some reason there are a few select people who in her day to day work life continually put her down. I have heard her balanced eating referred to as “OBSESSIVE” (it isn’t) and heard several people repeatedly tell her she’s too skinny (she isn’t). This poor woman who has worked so hard to be her best self endures daily hate, I just don’t get it.

I see it happen alot amongst my friends who are parents as well. There is hate for breastfeeding or formula feeding, for cosleeping or allowing your child to cry themselves to sleep….hate just everywhere, again I just don’t get it.

I guess I don’t get it because calling someone fat doesn’t make you thinner, referring to their eating plan as obsessive doesn’t make your eating plan any better, criticising someones parenting choices doesn’t make you a better parent. So at the end of the day all we are left with is jealousy or spite or hate or the thing I think fuels it all- insecurity.

Insecurity can make us do or say ridiculous things because somehow we feel somebody elses success makes us seem or feel more insignificant, which isn’t the case. Their success is just that theirs it has nothing to do with us so I propose that rather than HATE we CELEBRATE.

I am officially naming this You Go Girl (or Boy) week. When someone in your life (online or in person) does or says something that is a cause for celebration give them a positive reaction, a compliment, a gesture of support or a nice big You Go Girl!!

bring back the cheerleaders minus the short skirts my legs are still too pale from Winter.

Linking up with the amazing Jess at Essentially Jess because IBOT


28 thoughts on “Where Is The Love?

  1. i love mostly, that you live this message day in and day out you cheer people on regardless of how you feel or where you are at, you are so genuinely excited and supportive and full of love xx

  2. This is a great message! I think sometimes it’s just easier for some people to be negative (I know I often find myself in that trap) and they would rather do something that requires no work. It’s usually a reflection of what is going on in that persons life, rather than something that the person their hate is directed at has done.

  3. You nailed it Tegan! I personally drop people who are this way towards myself or family. Jealousy is a terrible thing. I like to compliment people all the time. In fact I usually drop one heartfelt compliment a day onto someone, whether I know them or not. It is always genuine and makes ME feel super too!

  4. I agree with the other comments – it’s definitely jealousy and a feeling of inferiority that causes people to be negative towards the success of others. I am a believer in ‘If you haven’t got anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.’ Everyone has their opinion on issues – give it in a nice way and then let the person make their own mind up. Just becuase it’s your opinion doesn’t make it right – it’s just yours !!
    A BIG “You Go Girl” to you – for passing on the message that positivity is sooooooooooo much better than negativity !!
    Have the best day !

  5. This is such a great blog Rach. I love it (you go girl !! Hehe) So many times I’ve been 10 steps forward and the slightest inclination of negativity can put me 9 steps back. I know this is a self conscious thing and that you shouldn’t let other people’s insecurities and nastiness affect you blah blah- it’s never that simple or easy. And no matter how much your friends repeat reinforce praise and love on you, it’s always….ALWAYS… The random compliment or show of support from someone unexpected that drives the positivity home.

  6. You go girl! Awesome post lovely. I don’t understand why people prefer to go the negative rather than positive. Surely just by the nature of it the positive should be our initial go to? You know even frowning uses more muscles that smiling yet people seem to frown rather than smile.
    I think you are right about the insecurity thing as well, which also gets me because if we spent as much time worrying about ourselves as we did other people…

    Fairy wishes and butterfly kisses xx

  7. Well said lovely – I have to say I agree. We are all so quick to cut each other down. But being told something nice is so easy to do. I actually saw my friend (IRL) Aroha @ Colours of Sunset and she looked gorgeous in a summer dress and I told her so – you know a little compliment goes a long way. GO YOU GIRL!!! x

    • I love that Aroha is your IRL friend…Lyndal is my IRL friend…makes me smile 🙂 Em you spread so much joy through your blog and your comments you are definitely a cheerleader…..Give me an E give me a M what does it spell? EM 🙂

  8. Thing is, many never seem to realise that putting down others will never fill your bucket with happiness. That is only achieved by filling the buckets of others. I taught this to my own kids and teach it to those I have in my school class. So, good on your friend for doing something that makes her happy 🙂

  9. Woohoo! You go girl! We definitely need more cheerleaders around. Some people just can’t handle others making positive changes in their life. I think jealousy is at the bottom of it. I’m glad things are going well with your friend.

  10. Love it – there is a chorus of cheerleading going on here – look what you started – you go girl! Comparison is the thief of joy – whether we compare to ‘make ourselves feel better’ or when we compare and ‘find ourselves wanting’. Either way it sucks. Our own skin – the only one we get to live in, is the best place to be comfortable.

  11. Rach you wouldn’t believe how unbelievably coincidental it is that you’ve blogged about this today. I shared this with my friend & we’re both nodding furiously with agreement xx

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