Here’s to us Here’s to love
All the times That we messed up
Here’s to you Fill the glass
Cause the last few nights
Have kicked my ass
I’m not a fighter, I’m quite a contradiction really because I have opinions which I voice but I’m not a fighter. I don’t like conflict and I am terrified of hurting peoples feelings but yesterday when I heard that someone we had always thought of as a friend was bad mouthing my husband in public I had had enough because for anyone who has ever met my husband would know that Chris is kind and gentle, I have never known anyone to be able to say anything nasty about him.
Now I’m not someone who will tell you about how my husband was wrongly accused of being a bad friend and being disloyal without giving you a bit of background. The “friend” in question was involved in a very nasty break up about 4 months ago and in that time we have had him over at our house numerous times where I have consoled him and he has cried, we have had dinner with him, Chris has gone out drinking with him and also to the beach in short we have been in my opinion supportive however Chris has apparently made the crime of not deleting the ex off of facebook- a girl who was one of the few people to support me through the time when we lost our baby.
So yesterday when I heard about what was said I sent the “friend” in question a message saying I thought he was better than someone who would bad mouth a friend in public I explained how we coud not justify deleting this girl when she had done such a kindness to us but that we also had not contacted her since the break up. I don’t think I was nasty I think if anything the message expressed disappointment that the situation could not be resolved. Being someone who is not open to reacting to nastiness I did not expect the reaction I got.
What I got was what I can only describe was an onslaught of what this friend called honesty where I was told that this girl only supported me through the miscarriage due to the fact that it was convenient and we lived down the street. He then went on to tell me about how all of our friends had made a lot of snide remarks about myself and my husband and I wish I could say that I was strong about it but I wasn’t this was my breaking point I cried and cried and cried. What a way to end 2012 huh? I apologised to my husband over and over I was sorry that he got stuck with the fat girl and that this made him the curse of jokes I was sorry if I embarassed him and he called me ridiculous and told me he loved me.
For any of you Sopranos fans I felt like Ginny Sacramoni (in the show she is a rather fat lady married to a skinny man who is blind to her size he is just completely besotted with his wife- the other guys sometimes make jokes about her size), I felt bad for my husband. But then I realised I’m not ashamed of being her because if the worst that people can say about me is that I’m fat then I must be a pretty good person. That the only snide comments can be about my size means 2 things how incredibly shallow those people are and also how awesome I am of a person. Plus I thought about it some more and some of those guys who make fat jokes got those jokes off of me- because nobody can laugh at you if you laugh first.
I would also like to do a shout out to my beautiful friends Sarah, Sandra and Kristy and an even bigger shout out to my big sister Kellie for giving me the advice to forget everyone else I have to concentrate on MY family first and that meant putting Chris and Molly before everyone else and that there is nothing wrong with that. So that’s how I choose to start 2013 with my hubby and my puppy and just forget about the world a bit.
If they give you hell
Tell em to go fuck themselves
Here’s to us
Linking up with Jess for the first IBOT of the year